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Sleepy June

I can find your lips by heart
in the dark
if I close my eyes.
It's not too hard--

if I slip my arms around your
nautical shoulders
when I felt bolder
It's not too much

to ask if I slide my legs
with a sigh
and entangle them with your thighs
What if

I had one wish
crossed my fingers at 11:11
as a star flew by
and the candles blew out

I'd ask for you to be
whispering with me in between
these sheets that have only known me

Big spoon, little spoon
no cow, but definitely the moon
Now he is in awe of us, two
Take me back to Green

in my dreams
to a neat little town
behind the moon,
beyond the rain
Strings of lyrics now
unstrung and restrung
strumming a lullaby
as I  f a  d   e     a     w      a       y
to sleep
where I'll be seeing you.

I liked this quote today.

"I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go. Things go wrong so that you can learn to appreciate them when they're right. You believe lies so that you can learn to trust no one but yourself. And sometimes things fall apart so that better things can fall together."

A Word to the Wise

I've gotten pretty good at cutting people out of my life who have hurt me: my count is up to four to date.  What does this say about me?  If someone really knew me, I think they would say that it means that I have been too open, too trusting, too naive with people that I don't know from Adam.  In the past, I have welcomed unknown people with open arms and allowed them to get to know me deep down before I really knew if they were trustworthy. I have served up my heart on a platter for them to do with what they choose, friends and romantic interests alike. Four of these people turned around and either handed it right back to me, or proceeded to stomp on it and hurt me deeply.

Going forward, I know now that I should be less naive about the ways of the world.  I think that it's good to take risks, but it's also healthy to reevaluate those risks and take a step back.  It's worthwhile to be a little cautious in making new friendships and forging new relationships, because what do you really know about these people, anyway?  Going forward, it is important to remember that people can talk a big game, but I should let their actions speak for who they truly are.  I want to remember to go with what my gut feelings tell me, because they are more often right than not. I shouldn't let fear of getting hurt again rule my interactions with the world, but I also should not throw caution to the wind.

High School Poetry: Part Trois

Dance of the Memory Kittens

her pink nose twitches.

the scent of your sweet cologne

permeates her nostrils.

the minuscule rosebud points to heaven

sniffing around in the dark for you.

fluffy white puff balls

bat the black yarn back and forth

pounding the inside of my skull,

a taunting metronome

pulsing your name:

a bitter waltz.

one, two, three

one, two, three

Dance of the memory

kittens

cloaked in the black silky strands

that my fingers once caressed.

the pads of their feet,

soft,

freckled,

your skin.

c'est tout.

I applaud

but the kittens will give no encore,

their mouths pursed in the same way

your tender lips once were when your face

fa d  e   d     a     w      a       y

into the dark recesses of my mind.

my fingers reach out

slowly, gently, so as not to alarm,

not to disturb their steady purring,

the droning stream of prickly memories.

Just one touch will surely

smooth their coarse manes.

But those fickle felines

with their fickle hearts

elude my grasp which proves too harsh.

High School Poetry: Part Deux

You Are Now Entering the Supermarket Zone


It is freezing in here!
It's
summer and I'm wearing two
sweatshirts
inside this ice box that is
literally hell
frozen over.

I'm nowhere near the frozen food section.

The incessant ding of this
cash register that
never fails to
shut down
in the middle of a
HUGE purchase
is driving me
up the Metfood wall.

It's 3:00. I close at nine.

Today, a blue haired lady
turned the same shade while
yelling at me for ringing up
cucumbers instead of zucchini.
I'd tell ya where you can put your
green vegetable, lady, if only I could
while keeping this friendly smile
plastered on my face.
See?  Have a nice day!

$5.50 an hour for this? Might as well get nothing.

I'm squinting.
But no sunlight can penetrate this cave
filled to the brim with packaged,
processed, why-don't-they-just-chew-it-for-you-too
quotation-mark-food-quotation-mark.
Oh, wait.
It's just the fluorescent lighting
reflecting off the shiny surface
of my boss's bald head.
The same boss who waves me
out into the pouring rain
to retrieve shopping carts
at 8:00 on Sunday night.

No one is going to need one.

There's a line
out the door
to jump into my spot.
Why would anyone subject
herself to this?
I didn't even get paid
for my training.
You know what,
that's it.
I'm throwing in the towel,
hanging up my apron,
grease stains and all
for the very last time.
Screw you, baldy!
I'm going to work at
Pizza Heaven.

High School Poetry: Part Une

Whateverosis


Unzip the zipper of your sternum
and step outside.
Examine your soul,
black with the smoke
and cheap beer you feed it;
An emaciated child
from Ethiopia
starving
for your repentance
for absolution
for His big O.K.

His ribs stick out
stretching the skin
over his gaunt torso,
the chaste bones itching to
perforate their leathery package
of sin wrap and false foil.
The outline of his teeth indent
his sunken cheeks;
He's a shadow of who he used to be,
a mere sketch
of who he was to become.

Now unbutton the skull.
Grab hold of your potential,
or what's left of that
bruised, rotten
apple
once a shiny crimson,
alive.
Teachers, friends, even I
glanced up at the healthy
tree of that mind,
saw its shiny promise,
wanted to climb up, snatch it
taste it, greedy for a purpose
pure and uncorrupted.

What has caused
this plague of your body,
diseased from the inside,
seeping corrupted pus
through your orifices
to form invisible boils
on your skin?
What has caused this
acute maturation of
apathy?

This cancer
infects more young people than HIV,
causes dazed, half-opened eyes,
slouching,
a shuffling, sauntering step
and a lethargic demeanor
which saturates the air;
You're a human garbage dump
and I can smell you from here.

Unexpected Blessings

You never know when blessings are coming. They are usually right around the corner and take you by blissful surprise! Keep patiently waiting for the amazing.

Dream Quashers, Be Gone!

Hey, you. Yeah, you, I'm talking to you, there, fellow dreamer. I want to remind you of one important thing: as the legendary 80's rock band, Journey once said, don't stop believing. All your life, there are going to be people who, for one reason or another, try to stand in the way of you and your dreams. Maybe they're jealous of your youth, your lust for life, your unadulterated promise. Maybe they are jealous of your youthful idealism, your untainted passion. Maybe they are intimidated by your intelligence, your competence, your skillfulness at what you do. Maybe they are scared that you are going to take their job. Whatever it is, DO NOT listen to these naysayers! They are only trying to bring you down and hold you back from being your greatest. Just keep on plugging away at trying to reach your dream and trying to be the best whatever it is that you want to be. Stay true to what you know to be true, what you know is right. Don't even listen to that little voice inside your own head that says that you can't, you won't, you couldn't possibly achieve your dreams and do your best. That little voice that Anne Lamott termed our own personal radio K-FKD. Just tune out the negativity as best you can and stay true to yourself. It may take time and practice to do so, but don't give up. You can do anything that you set your mind to if you believe in yourself, that you CAN and you WILL do it.  Go get 'em, tigers!

Update

So I am about halfway done with my Master's degree at Hunter College in Deaf and Hard of Hearing Education grades K-12, with a dual certification in regular education grades 1-6.  I have 25 credits under my belt and another 33 to go!  I am taking three summer classes, so that will knock out another 8 credits.  It's been a stressful and chock full semester, but I made it through.  I even got a job as a teaching assistant this summer at the school for the Deaf that I have been volunteering at all year.  Hooray!  Things are looking up.  Going for my teaching assistant certification, and then my teacher's certification.  I hope to graduate by May or August of 2012.  Not that I want to rush through my Master's, but I am eager to get into the classroom and teach, already. Two more finals to go this semester, and I will be done May 23rd.  No rest for the weary--it will be a busy summer.  Looking forward to it!

Signed,
The Energizer Bunny

P.S. GO YANKEES!

I Can Has Internetz Video?

This is what happens when I am left to my own devices on a Saturday night.  I obviously can't be trusted.  Oh, wellz.  I am on the interwebz making singing debut!  ROFLMAO OMGSTFU.

Bon Voyage!

I've been talking with my friend Karin about possibly doing an EF College Break trip to London and Paris over New Year's 2012.  We wanted to go to Ireland, too, so maybe we will plan the trip independently because she has a lot of family there.  It might be cheaper if we plan it ourselves.  But the EF College Break is really cool because it is all-inclusive: the price includes hotel, airfare, a 24-hour tour guide, entrance to museums and special attractions, and one meal a day.  It doesn't include lunch or dinner, drinks (obviously), or shopping.  So, if I'm not broke by that time, we may go.

My mom and I also discussed going to Italy together the summer after I graduate and get my master's degree.  I was thinking something along the lines of an Adriana Trigiani tour, since we read all of her books, love Adriana, and would love to see the sites on the tour (think Rome, Amalfi Coast, Capri, or Florence, Tuscany, Arezzo, and Pisa).  That's an even more expensive one, though!  I guess after I went to Ireland, I caught a little bit of the travel bug.  But there's worse things, right?  Just don't ask my bank account...

More stamps on my passaporto, per favore!

Trash Talk

Alec Baldwin:  Hello, John.

John Krasinski:  Hey, quick question: are you a Phillies fan now, since you guys couldn't get Cliff Lee, and he went to Philadelphia for less money?

Alec Baldwin:  First of all, Yankee fans don't consider Philadelphia to be a legitimate sports town, John, you know that.

John Krasinski:  I'm worried for you. Are you prepared for what's coming? It's going to be the worst misery you've ever experienced in the history of this rivalry.

Alec Baldwin:  John, John, John, for the last time, this is not a rivalry. Just like fire doesn’t have a rivalry with kindling, lawn mowers don’t have a rivalry with grass, America doesn’t have a rivalry with Costa Rica.

John Krasinski:  (forced laughter) Ha, ha, ha. Lemme ask you something, seriously though. How are you a Yankees fan at all? It’s like being a huge fan of fascism. 

Alec Baldwin:  No, it’s like being a huge fan of winning—which we do—relentlessly.

John Krasinski:  Pfft, not this year, man.  Not this year.

Alec Baldwin:  Cla-ssic Red Sox fan.  Go ahead, celebrate in April—we’ll dance in October. 

John Krasinski:  You will be dead in October!

Alec Baldwin:  ….

John Krasinski:  …Was that a little too much?

Alec Baldwin:  I think you know it was.

John Krasinski:   Sorry, I just got—really worked up.

Alec Baldwin:  (beat)  We all do.

Campfire Song Songs

 Once a camp counselor, always a camp counselor.

The Cannibal King
Theeeeeee Cannibal King
with the big nose ring
fell in love with the dusty ma-a-aid
and every night
in the pale moon light
across the lake he ca-a-ame
He hugged and he kissed
his pretty little miss
in the shade of the bamboo tre-e-ee
and every night
in the pale moon light
it sounded like this to me-e-e
BA RUMP (smooch smooch) BA RUMP (smooch smooch)
BA RUMP BADI YADI AY-AY-AY
BA RUMP (smooch smooch) BA RUMP (smooch smooch)
BA RUMP BADI YADI AY-AY-AY

We'll build a bungalo big enough for two
big enough for two, my honey, big enough for two
Then when we're married, happy we'll be
under the bamboo, under the bamboo tree
If you'll be M-I-N-E mine,
I'll be T-H-I-N-E thine
and I'll L-O-V-E love you
all the T-I-M-E time
You are the B-E-S-T best
of all the R-E-S-T rest
and I'll L-O-V-E love you
all the T-I-M-E time

Match in the gas tank, BOOM BOOM!
Love in the moon light, WHOO WHOO!
Skunk in the cellar, P U!

Camp St. Joseph's Song
I go to camp St. Joseph's, pity me
There's not a man in the vicinity!
And every night at 9, they lock the doors
I don't know what the heck I ever came here for
I'm gonna pack my bags and homeward bound
I'm gonna turn this camp right upside down
I'm gonna smoke and drink and neck and peck so what the heck--
The heck with the whole damn camp!

Camp Anchor Bus Classics:
- The Green Grass Grows All Around
- Baby Shark Song
- Treasure Chest Song
- I Am A Pizza Song
- The Wheels on the Bus
- Down By The Bay

Esperanza Rising

I am required to do a children's literature review that involves three author studies for my Developmental Reading class.  Originally, I picked Maya Angelou for the author of the two novels I must include, but her writing seemed a little above-level in terms of difficulty of text as well as content for K-6 readers.  So I instead picked Pam Muñoz Ryan, who wrote Esperanza Rising and Becoming Naomi León.  I'm currently reading Esperanza Rising, which begins in Mexico in 1924 right before the Great Depression, and right before the harvest of the grapes from Esperanza's family vineyard that always coincides with her birthday.  Her father is tragically killed by a group of bandits on the eve of her 13th birthday.  But more tradgedy follows for Esperanza and her family; her power-hungry uncle sets fire to their ranch home and vineyards when her mother refuses to marry him, and left with nothing, they must flee to America.  One quote resonated with me so far:

       Abuelita squeezed Esperanza's hand.  "Do not be afraid to start over.  When I was your age, I left Spain with my mother, father, and sisters.  A Mexican official had offered my father a job here in Mexico.  So we came.  We had to take several ships and the journey lasted months.  When we arrived, nothing was as promised.  There were many hard times.  But life was also exciting.  And we had each other.  Esperanza, do you remember the story of the phoenix, the lovely young bird that is reborn from its own ashes?"
       Esperanza nodded.  Abuelita had read it to her many times from a book of myths.
       "We are like the phoenix," said Abuelita.  "Rising again, with a new life ahead of us."

Awesome 90s Games

Just for fun.  Remember these?

 

Simon, the tricky reflex tester.  I happen to have the reflexes of a panther, so I always did well in this game.  I was wondering the other day if this game would have been easier if there were no sound?  Beep, boop, womp womp!

Something tells me that many a fingertip was taken off playing this old 90s past-time.  Good times, good times.

   

"You'll get caught up in the, Crossfire!  Crossfire!  CROSS FIYAAHHH!!"  This game wins the best-theme-song-for-a-board-game award.  Kudos to you, Crossfire.  Thanks for starting many a fight between me and my brother.  This one's for you. 

Yeah, I collected Pogs.  I'm not sure why--sort of like that Tamigotchi phase.  We just sort of did it without thinking, wanted it because we were told to want it.  Oh, American advertisers--you're good at your job.  I think I witnessed someone actually playing with Pogs two times, max.  All I remember doing was looking at my collection on end.  Weird.

"Segaaaa."  Oh, game gear.  How many hours I wasted trying to beat Sonic the Hedgehog on you.  That's the only game I ever played, except trying and failing at Sonic II.  Gooood times.

This last one's not really related to 90s games.  But I wonder if any places in the 80s/90s actually looked like The Max from Saved by the Bell, a show I watched entirely too much of.  If so, I hope they have already burned to the ground.  The lameness is astounding.  How did anyone ever think this was cool (or am I the only loser who thought so)?!

And we end with the 90s in one picture.  Fresh to the death.

Edward Estlin Cummings was Beautiful.

i carry your heart with me(i carry it in

my heart)i am never without it(anywhere

i go you go,my dear;and whatever is done

by only me is your doing,my darling)

——————————————————— i fear

no fate(for you are my fate,my sweet)i want

no world(for beautiful you are my world,my true)

and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant

and whatever a sun will always sing is you

here is the deepest secret nobody knows

(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud

and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows

higher than soul can hope or mind can hide)

and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart)                                                                      -e.e. cummings

Oh! The Places You'll Go!

Never give up.  Never lose hope.  Be thankful and persevere.  Be positive at all times.  Find the good in all things.  Look up.  Everything will be alright.


Oh! The Places You’ll Go!
by the incomparable Dr. Seuss
Congratulations!
Today is your day.
You’re off to Great Places!
You’re off and away!

You have brains in your head.
You have feet in your shoes.
You can steer yourself any direction you choose.
You’re on your own. And you know what you know. And YOU are the guy who’ll decide where to go.

You’ll look up and down streets. Look’em over with care. About some you will say, “I don’t choose to go there.” With your head full of brains and your shoes full of feet, you’re too smart to go down a not-so-good street.

And you may not find any you’ll want to go down. In that case, of course, you’ll head straight out of town. It’s opener there in the wide open air.

Out there things can happen and frequently do to people as brainy and footsy as you.

And when things start to happen, don’t worry. Don’t stew. Just go right along. You’ll start happening too.

Oh! The Places You’ll Go!

You’ll be on your way up!
You’ll be seeing great sights!
You’ll join the high fliers who soar to high heights.

You won’t lag behind, because you’ll have the speed. You’ll pass the whole gang and you’ll soon take the lead. Wherever you fly, you’ll be best of the best. Wherever you go, you will top all the rest.

Except when you don’t.
Because, sometimes, you won’t.

I’m sorry to say so but, sadly, it’s true that Bang-ups and Hang-ups can happen to you.

You can get all hung up in a prickle-ly perch. And your gang will fly on. You’ll be left in a Lurch.

You’ll come down from the Lurch with an unpleasant bump. And the chances are, then, that you’ll be in a Slump.

And when you’re in a Slump, you’re not in for much fun. Un-slumping yourself is not easily done.

You will come to a place where the streets are not marked. Some windows are lighted. But mostly they’re darked. A place you could sprain both your elbow and chin! Do you dare to stay out? Do you dare to go in? How much can you lose? How much can you win?

And if you go in, should you turn left or right…or right-and-three-quarters? Or, maybe, not quite? Or go around back and sneak in from behind? Simple it’s not, I’m afraid you will find, for a mind-maker-upper to make up his mind.

You can get so confused that you’ll start in to race down long wiggled roads at a break-necking pace and grind on for miles across weirdish wild space, headed, I fear, toward a most useless place.

The Waiting Place…for people just waiting.

Waiting for a train to go or a bus to come, or a plane to go or the mail to come, or the rain to go or the phone to ring, or the snow to snow or waiting around for a Yes or No or waiting for their hair to grow. Everyone is just waiting.

Waiting for the fish to bite or waiting for wind to fly a kite or waiting around for Friday night or waiting, perhaps, for their Uncle Jake or a pot to boil, or a Better Break or a string of pearls, or a pair of pants or a wig with curls, or Another Chance. Everyone is just waiting.

No! That’s not for you!
Somehow you’ll escape all that waiting and staying. You’ll find the bright places where Boom Bands are playing. With banner flip-flapping, once more you’ll ride high! Ready for anything under the sky. Ready because you’re that kind of a guy!

Oh, the places you’ll go! There is fun to be done! There are points to be scored. There are games to be won. And the magical things you can do with that ball will make you the winning-est winner of all. Fame! You’ll be famous as famous can be, with the whole wide world watching you win on TV.

Except when they don’t. Because, sometimes, they won’t.

I’m afraid that some times you’ll play lonely games too. Games you can’t win ‘cause you’ll play against you.

All Alone!
Whether you like it or not, Alone will be something you’ll be quite a lot.

And when you’re alone, there’s a very good chance you’ll meet things that scare you right out of your pants. There are some, down the road between hither and yon, that can scare you so much you won’t want to go on.

But on you will go though the weather be foul. On you will go though your enemies prowl. On you will go though the Hakken-Kraks howl. Onward up many a frightening creek, though your arms may get sore and your sneakers may leak. On and on you will hike. And I know you’ll hike far and face up to your problems whatever they are.

You’ll get mixed up, of course, as you already know. You’ll get mixed up with many strange birds as you go. So be sure when you step. Step with care and great tact and remember that Life’s a Great Balancing Act. Just never forget to be dexterous and deft. And never mix up your right foot with your left.

And will you succeed?
Yes! You will, indeed!
(98 and ¾ percent guaranteed.)

Kid, you’ll move mountains!
So…be your name Buxbaum or Bixby or Bray or Mordecai Ale Van Allen O’Shea, you’re off to Great Places!
Today is your day!
Your mountain is waiting.
So…get on your way!

Sunflower Sunshower

If I was a flower growing wild and free, all I'd want is you to be my sweet honey bee, and if I was a tree growing tall and green, all I'd want is you to shade me and be my leaves.
-- Barry Louis Polisar

Wonderful Town

I wrote this about a year ago, when I was trying to re-find myself again.  So much has changed since then, but the most important things haven't.

New York: What's Not to Love?

1. The way the buildings shine and glint in the sunlight.
2. The shape of the skyline and the overlapping buildings, forming a stairway to the sky.
3. The way the buildings light up at night, like fireflies trapped in a jar.
4. How frightening and humbling it is to gaze up to the top spires of St. Patrick's Cathedral
5.  Going to Rock Center during Christmastime to see The Tree
6. The big department stores like Macy's, Bloomingdale's, and Lord & Taylor, that seem to be out of another time
7. The way the steam billows out of the manholes and subway grates, creating a smokey romantic look
8. The way you get on the subway and are surrounded by a melting pot of people, who can all live, work, and peacefully co-exist (for the most part)
9. The subway system--its speed and character.  How you just dont make eye contact with people, let alone strike up a conversation.  It's just not done!
10.  Performers in the subway
11. ice skating in Bryant Park
12. the way people walk down the street with a purpose and a drive, always in a hurry
13. The way Times Square lights up the night like broad day light
14. The fact that there is always something going on, Broadway shows, plays, concerts, dancing, athletic events, etc.
15. the diversity of restaurants at your fingertips
16. the plethora of museums and art galleries
17. that the city never sleeps...there's always something open, even at 4 in the morning
18. we got the best pizza, the best bagels, and the best cannolis around
19. a distinctive accent
20. the best team in baseball--The New York Yankees!!!!!!!!
21. The fact that there is always a chance that you will have a celebrity sighting
22. reading the humongous billboards when you drive in or out of the city
23. the way it feels to zoom through the Lincoln tunnel.  I love those lights
24. the sound of the city never stops--it's alive with people, cars, trucks, trains, horns, sirens, hustle and bustle
25. the grid--you can always figure out where you are and where you've got to go
26. Little Italy and the San Gennaro festival in the summer
27. Greenwich Village
28. Penn Station
29. Grand Central Station
30. Madison Square Garden
31. Chinatown
32. Hell's Kitchen
33. The outer boroughs
34. The Staten Island Ferry
35. Central Park
36. The Central Park zoo
37. Columbia University
38. how tourists and slow-walkers will make your blood pressure shoot up to dangerous levels
39. Museum of Natural History
40.  Where the hell is the Original Ray's Pizza and why do we care so much?
41. It's hard to get a bad slice of pizza
42. Finding out little secrets hidden away, like a hole-in-the-wall Mexican restaurant that has great food and even better margaritas (Benny's!) or the fact that in certain places of Grand Central Station, you can stand and whisper into a corner and someone canl hear you across the room if they stand in a certain spot.
43. That nowhere else is going to be New York, and you know it when you go.
44. Lincoln Center
45. going to a game at Yankee Stadium, Citi Field, or Keyspan Park
46. walking across the The Brooklyn Bridge
47. Coney Island: the Cyclone, the Wonderwheel, the boardwalk, the Original Nathan's, and the Aquarium
48. the surprising kindness of strangers if you do ask for directions...and the rest of the people on the train who chime in to give you a better way to go
49. the impatience that is ingrained in this city
50. breathing a sigh of relief whenever I see the skyline again coming back into New York whenever I leave, and wondering why the hell I ever left.

Take Chances.

Written on a Starbucks cup:

I used to feel so alone in the city.

All those gazillions of people and

then me, on the outside. Because

how do you meet a new person?

I was very stumped by this for many

years. And then I realized, you just

say, "Hi."  They may ignore you.  Or

you may marry them.  And that

possibility is worth that one word.

--Augusten Burroughs,

author of Running With Scissors

It will decide everything.

 "Nothing is more practical than finding God, that is, than falling in love in a quite absolute, final way. What you are in love with, what seizes your imagination, will affect everything. It will decide what will get you out of bed in the morning, what you do with your evenings, how you spend your weekends, what you read, who you know, what breaks your heart, and what amazes you with joy and gratitude. Fall in love, stay in love, and it will decide everything."

Pedro Arrupe, S.J.

I really like this song and these lyrics

Lullaby for a Stormy Night - Vienna Teng

little child, be not afraid
though rain pounds harshly against the glass
like an unwanted stranger, there is no danger
I am here tonight

little child, be not afraid
though thunder explodes and lightning flash
illuminates your tear-stained face
I am here tonight

and someday you'll know
that nature is so
the same rain that draws you near me
falls on rivers and land
on forests and sand
makes the beautiful world that you'll see
in the morning

little child, be not afraid
though storm clouds mask your beloved moon
and its candlelight beams, still keep pleasant dreams
I am here tonight

little child, be not afraid
though wind makes creatures of our trees
and their branches to hands, they're not real, understand
and I am here tonight

and someday you'll know
that nature is so
the same rain that draws you near me
falls on rivers and land
on forests and sand
makes the beautiful world that you'll see
in the morning

for you know, once even I was a
little child, and I was afraid
but a gentle someone always came
to dry all my tears, trade sweet sleep for fears
and to give a kiss goodnight

well now I am grown
and these years have shown
that rain's a part of how life goes
but it's dark and it's late
so I'll hold you and wait
'til your frightened eyes do close

and I hope that you'll know

that nature is so
the same rain that draws you near me
falls on rivers and land
on forests and sand
makes the beautiful world that you'll see
in the morning

everything's fine in the morning
the rain'll be gone in the morning
but I'll still be here in the morning

Shine Brightly

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.

It is our light, not our darkness that frightens us.
We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous?
Actually, who are we not to be?
You are a child of God.
Your playing small doesn’t serve the world.
There’s nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you.
We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.
It’s not just in some of us, it’s in everyone.
And as we let our light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our own fears, our presence automatically liberates others.

Source: A Return to Love, by Marianne Williamson, as quoted by Nelson Mandela in his inaugural speech, 1994

Mortality

It means that you can never give up—

People are counting on you

People love you and need yours in return.

It means that you must never give up—

No matter how much it hurts

Or how hard it gets.

It means that you’ve got to live your life

To its absolute limit,

Its fullest capacity,

Until you think you might pop,

Bursting with alive like a hot air balloon.

You’ve got to live it for Kaitlin

And Tim Sharkey

And Jamie and Paige and Mike

Because they won’t get another chance.

It means you must never let your light flicker

Or dim—never let it extinguish.

You must always be your most

Brilliant, vibrant, wonderful, terrific

Terrible, awesome, unexplainable

Self!

Because you’re alive!

Because you’ve got shoes on your feet

And feet in your shoes!

Breath in your lungs!

Teeth in your mouth! A brain in your head!

Lovely eyes to take in

the lovely world all around you

and lips to be thankful

for every last
speck
of
dust.

What is this life we’re given?

We’re not meant to know—

The answers are not here,

Not in any concrete way.

But it means you must hold on with every last

Ounce of strength you can muster

To this
this life, this breath, this moment

Because you don’t know when it’ll suddenly—

Terrifyingly— much too soon— irrevocably— be

gone.

Rest in peace, Kaitlin Kenneally.  The world is much dimmer without your light shining brightly.